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One of Amy Shumer's comedy sketches features a dude who isn't calling her back but masturbates to the photo of an old Italian woman on the jar of his spaghetti sauce. It's hilarious but not totally ridiculous, according to men I've interviewed about their masturbation habits. I think of the screen I'm staring at. According to my mostly anecdotal research, here are the six themes that are on the minds of American men when they get off.
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11 Things Guys Do When They Masturbate

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Questions About Male Masturbation - What to Know About Masturbating

As women, we all have sex drives. They can be low or they can be high, but they exist. Many women masturbate to achieve orgasm because of these aforementioned sex drives. This still comes as a shock to folks because well, female masturbation isn't talked about the same way male masturbation is talked about. This is a fact that used to drive me nuts until I realized one critical thing: Men and women have VERY different relationships with self-pleasuring. When I started talking to my female friends about male masturbation, they all seemed baffled by the way in which the men they know handle it and how men really think about it.
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22 Questions About Male Masturbation You’ve Always Wondered

What makes it so appealing? And, vice versa. Some women are going to love the idea of mutual masturbation. The best way to find out is by discussing the idea with her in advance.
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It always begins with him either not even realizing he's masturbating or realizing he has an hour to kill. Every time. Either we're just scrolling through Twitter and realize we've unconsciously had our hand in our pants for the last 15 minutes, or we have nothing to do so we're like, "Guess we might as well crank one out.
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